Your mind in a whirlpool with thoughts about an event going around and around and round and you have kind of stopped living? Here is a mind clearing tool for you to use. You will need a pen and paper.
Write down the event that is causing you this mind chaos.
Then write down all your mind talk linked to this event – take your time and write down any thought that pops up in your mind.
Then look at each sentence and mark the thought as either TRUE OR FALSE
If you can’t prove it to be 100% the truth it will have to be FALSE.
Then circle the sentences that are TRUE and write them down on anther piece of paper. (ditch the other one it is just your truth or just your story)
Look at these few sentences and then consider what action you wish to take with regards to these issues.
HERE IS AN EXAMPLE TO ASSIST YOU WITH THIS SELF COACHING TOOL
You found out that your underage teenager daughter who said she was sleeping over at a friend had not done so but had gone night clubbing till the early hours of the morning and is now home sleeping.
Here is your possible list
I am so angry – T
My child lied to me – T
She could have been kidnapped-F
She has no consideration-F
Can I trust her again? T/F
She could have been drugged –F
I have not taught her to look after themselves. -F
She can’t look after herself- F
She does not know what alcohol is and does to one -F
I will now have to follow her all the time – F
She was with strangers ? T
Maybe she was with a boy ? F
I am not a good parent as my child would not done this if I was- F
I am a failure- F
She does not care about me- F
She does not love me – F
I don’t know what to do about this- F
This makes me so sad- T
Out of the above we have an event (daughter went out and lied) and my emotions ( am sad, angry) as the truth. There are some questions about where the child was and what she had done.
Your emotions and the event are the truth the other thoughts is serious mind speculations and stuff going around and around creating your turmoil. Besides the fact you probably now have a headache or stomach-ache.
Now the question is WHAT ACTION ARE YOU GOING TO UNDERTAKE ITO THE TRUTH INFORMATION YOU HAVE CONFIRMED in your head.
You own your emotions so now lets consider the other truths. She lied and I don’t know where she was and who she was with. ACTION. I am going to sit with her and ask her to give me insight into where she was last night and who she was with. With this information consider the ‘what do you choose to do ? Ground her for a month is an example. This is something I will be able to control and deliver on. If you can’t adhere to punishment that you wish to hand out then don’t use it . REMEMBER TO CLEAR YOUR MIND AS IT CREATES SUFFERING – HAPPY CREATING